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BREAKING NEWS

Drunk guy passes out while smoking in Walmart john
Catches underwear on fire
Things go downhill
from there

April 20, 2017




CLICK TO ENLARGE
Chronicle staff

(SPANAWAY, WA.) -- You just can't make this stuff up. Click the tweet from Central Pierce (County) Fire & Rescue made early Wednesday evening.

CLICK TO OPEN >>>>>>>>>>>>

In case you can't open the graphic, here's the deal.

This unidentified fellow mentioned in that tweet was lit to the gills and also had a lit cigarette in his hand as he was attempting to do nature's work in the john at the Walmart store located at a 20307 Mountain Highway East in Spanaway.

He passed out right there on the porcelain throne. It was not known if the man had completed nature's work before he passed out or was in the process of completing that work when darkness fell.

Firefighters get the call around 6:30 pm after fire alarms went off. Bathroom was filled with smoke when they got there.

The story is the man sat down on the toilet, pants down, falls asleep and evidently a hot ash from his cigarette catches his underwear on fire. Normally that would be a pretty rude awakening but toilet-man did not know his pants were on fire because he was passed out.

The Morning News Tribune says a firefighter used a dry chemical extinguisher to put out the fire in the man's hot pants and that woke the guy up and he then pulls a knife on the firefighters.

This could have gotten very ugly in a hurry. But, things finally got under control and firefighters tended to his burn injuries to his legs and then he was taken to a local hospital for follow up treatment.

Let this be a lesson kids. Do not allow that demon rum or wicked whiskey to pass over those innocent lips of yours or you too could end up in flames sitting on a toilet in a Walmart store.

Keep on the righteous path. Do what the good books say. Keep your nose clean and underwear flame-free at all times and you'll have a good life.

Well, actually the chances of your future being fully hosed in the America of today is about 50-50.

But you may as well face that prospect sober.









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