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The knife massacre of chldren that never happened
February 22, 2018
Washington State House Minority Leader Rep. Dan Kristiansen of Snohomish: that crazy blade runner in Norway murdered 2 dozen kids with a knife! (NOT).
By B. Tanner
Special To The Chronicle
This report was first published the morning of 2/22/18 in the Breaking News column
(OLYMPIA, WA.) – You’re gonna love this. After you get done reading our front page feature story (Thurs. 2/22/18) about the NRA’s Water Boy, Sen. Marco (‘Little Marco’) Rubio of Florida and his two-step jive dance last night on CNN’s Town Hall Meeting about guns and dead school kids and guns and dead school kids and more guns and more dead school kids, check this out.
Another NRA toe-the-line gun boy (or wannabe), Washington State House Minority Leader Rep. Dan Kristiansen of Snohomish told a story this week about a, “Norwegian knife-murderer that sounded like it was ripped straight from a Scandinavian crime thriller,” according to a report by the Seattle Times.
The Times Joe O’Sullivan of the paper’s Olympia Bureau tells the story of Kristiansen spinning this yarn about how, during a visit he made to Norway several years ago, some goon “attacked a youth camp on an island — and killed more than two dozen children with a knife.”
Whoa! Stop the presses. Must have been one hell of a mass murder by that bad-ass Blade Runner.
Big Joe then writes: “More people are actually killed by knives than by guns,” said Kristiansen in a regularly scheduled news conference Tuesday, after he recounted the Norway story. “Not just in our country but around the world.”
Just one slight problem there, says Big Joe. That knife attack never happened, according to a Norwegian criminology professor and then, “Several studies disprove Kristiansen’s assertion that knives contribute to more deaths than firearms,” says the Time report.
Is this a hoot? Now we got GOP gun boys making up stories about knife massacres to deflect attention away from the ongoing human carnage in this country with weapons of war that any dingbat can buy with $300, glassy eyes and voices in his head telling him to go wipe out a grade school.
Big Joe says Dan’s remarks “came on a day Kristiansen and other Republicans sought to deflect questions about proposals in the Washington Legislature to increase gun regulations.”
Oh good Lord. Memo to Dan: it is not nice to fib Dan. Next time you’re tempted to do that sort of thing just stop and ask yourself, “What would Jesus do?” And then you’ll have your answer and know what righteous path you should take. Trust in Jesus Dan. He'll guide you.
Read it and weep right here boys and girls.